everytime i think i’ve had the worst day of my life, it soon gets topped by something even more atrocious.
i dont want to live. i dont want to go on. there is no future where i can just be. why did i mention the fact that i beat my mom in tennis? it just all snowballed into me being a whore because a family member molested me for years as a kid and getting my hair yanked out of my head. im sick to death of this being my reality. i dont have the words to say how i feel. im so fucking hurt. IM FUCKING HURT. WHY AM I IGNORED BY EVERYONE EXCEPT TO BE ABUSED. WHY. PLEASE SOMEONE GIVE ME AN ANSWER. im hated by every single person i meet. and i dont know what i’m doing wrong to make this happen. it feels so inevitable.
i debated stabbing myself with a knife the night it happened. i’m so pathetic. i cant do anything.
no one’s going to read this. why even bother.
a space for me 
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